


Everyone is Gone (That Can’t Happen to You)

by Anonymous



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Anal, Angst, Bunker Sex, Emotional Comfort, Fingering, First Time, Fluff, Happy Ending, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Make up sex, Porn With Plot, Sam has a big dick, Top!Sam, Wincest - Freeform, all the women sam has lost, bottom!Dean, brothers in love, not purely smut but mostly, sam has ptsd
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-16
Updated: 2020-07-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 17:40:27
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 11,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25320268
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/
Summary: Everyone that Sam’s ever been with has ended up dead. As him and Dean grow closer, he becomes afraid that he will doom his brother to that same fate. As a result of that fear, he pulls away from Dean every time his brother tries to get close.There is some angst. More comfort. Even MORE smut.Short tease:“Everybody that I’ve ever been with is gone. It’s like I’m cursed, or something. The people I love… they all end up dead. I can’t…” His voice cracked and he took a deep breath before looking to Dean with laser focused eyes, “That can’t happen to you.”
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Sam Winchester
Comments: 3
Kudos: 112
Collections: Anonymous





	Everyone is Gone (That Can’t Happen to You)

This has been happening for weeks, now. 

Sam and Dean get close, their bodies mere inches apart, mouths hovering… and then Sam pulls away. 

Every. single. time.

There was their first kiss -which could barely be considered a peck- that Sam claimed to not remember because he was drunk, when Dean knew for a fact he’d only had one beer. The kid was a lightweight, sure, but not  _ that much _ of a lightweight.

Days after that, a redhead police officer with sparkling blue eyes slid Sam her number as they left the station, and when Sam wasn’t looking… Dean threw the card with the number away. Or at least, Dean thought Sam wasn’t looking. Truth was, the younger brother saw the whole thing with his own two eyes and had no idea how to feel about it. There was only one thing that was certain: Dean didn’t want him going out with the officer. 

Sam never brought it up, scared of being shot down.

That night, Dean came back to the motel, stumbling all over himself and whiskey on his breath. He walked right up to Sam and slammed their lips together, humming into his brother’s mouth. At first, Sam melted into it. He wanted Dean, always had. But there were reasons this couldn’t happen. So, he pulled away and went to bed, leaving Den speechless and disappointed.

The next time they kissed, they were both stone sober. Sam had been taken by a pack of werewolves on a hunt and left for dead. When Dean found him, he was so fucking relieved, he kissed him. It was the most notable one yet, but still, Sam jerked himself away. No. He couldn’t. Dean was too relieved that Sam was okay to even really notice.

Again they were sober five days later when Dean woke up to the bone chilling sound of Sam’s screams filling the bunker. His brother had a nasty nightmare, and was still shaking and reeling in the aftermath when Dean came storming into his room. There were tears in his eyes and his face was ghostly pale.

“Are you okay?” Dean had asked, walking forward.

Sam shook his head rapidly in denial and Dean immediately pulled him into his chest. He held his brother tight in his arms and let Sam cry into his shoulder, shushing him quietly and rubbing his back gently as Sam calmed down. He inhaled and exhaled methodically as he rambled quietly about Lucifer and the cage. 

Dean held the back of his head and told him sincerely, “You’re safe now.” 

And then something took over Sam and he started kissing down the line of Dean’s throat, sucking at his neck until his brother’s head fell back. When Dean let out a little moan, however, Sam snapped back into it and jumped away from his brother like he’d been hit. His eyes went wide and he told Dean he needed to leave immediately.

“I’m going back to bed, please go.” He begged, turning his back to his brother and hiding his face.

Dean was left in shock and  _ hurt _ . He had felt his heart open for Sam when he felt his lips start trailing down his skin, but his brother had made him feel stupid for doing so. His head was spinning. First Sam was kissing him, then he was pushing him away. Then he was kissing his neck and then telling him to leave. It was all a mess.

He started to convince himself that he was making it all up in his head and that Sam didn’t actually want him. But then on a random Saturday night in Tampa, Dean got flirt on by a brunette waitress with a jennifer lopez figure, and Sam eyed her like the antichrist all night. When the men stumbled back into the car, Dean asked him what his deal was and Sam leaned over and kissed him in response. Even weirder, he growled “Mine.” Into Dean’s mouth like a command. Dean instantly got hard, but when Sam pulled away, he looked terrified by his own actions. Definitely not willing to talk about it anytime soon. He stuttered and apologized and that was it.

But Dean figured it was a good sign. He woke up the next morning and kissed Sam, testing the waters. They were both sober and he knew Sam at least had some interest from the night before. Except… Sam freaked out on him, left the motel, and didn’t come back until the next morning. Dean filled the whole with the brunette waitress. He fucked her to distract himself from the devastating realization that Sam didn’t want him back. 

Sam walked in during the middle of it. Dean was literally buried to the hilt and her back was arched up off the bed. The brothers made eye contact and then Sam ran out, tears in his eyes. 

What Dean didn’t know was that when Sam left, he drove the impala to a library parking lot, parked far away from any people, and sobbed. What Dean didn’t know was the reason Sam kept pulling away from him. And it wasn’t because he didn’t love him back. What Dean didn’t know was that Sam believed he would be putting his life on the line if he chose to be with his brother. Every woman he’d ever been with ended up dead, or worse. It was like he was cursed. Being in a relationship with Sam didn’t end well, and he couldn’t risk that with Dean. He would rather stay platonic forever and be miserable than toy with Dean’s life. 

So he spent the night convincing himself that Dean was in the right for sleeping with another person, and that it was better that way, anyway. He wasn’t risking Dean’s safety. Ever. So when he returned the next morning, he out on a brave face and tried his best to act unbothered.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Dean had asked him nervously.

To which Sam replied, “Golden.”

They both knew he was full of shit.

But it didn’t amount to anything until they were in the bunker alone on a Tuesday afternoon, playing cards and drinking beer. The mood was great and the morale was high. 

Dean leaned towards Sam to kiss him, and Sam let him.

And then pulled away. 

Dean reached his boiling point. 

“Okay, Sam, you know what?” He let out in a long, exhausted sigh that sounded incredibly frustrated. He took a small step backwards and crossed his arms in front of his chest, blinking his eyes closed once before swallowing and speaking again, “I am so sick of this back and forth,  _ will-he-won’t-he _ , bullshit. You either want this or you don’t. I’m done being yanked both ways.”

Sam closed his eyes and let out a long breath, tilting his head just slightly. Dean was right in every sense of the word. Sam had been leading him on only to push him away for weeks now. It wasn’t like he was trying to, it just… it kept happening. He would convince himself that it was okay, and then reality hit him at the last second every single time. It wasn’t okay, and it wasn’t fair. He just didn’t know how to fix it. Or even  _ if  _ he could fix it. The only thing he knew for sure was that being with Dean put Dean’s life at risk. And that was enough. 

“This isn’t fair to you. I know that.” He admitted quietly, shifting his weight between his feet uneasily. He cleared his throat and slowly brought his gaze up to Dean’s, “But, it’s just… It’s not that simple.”

Dean huffed out an exaggerated breath and raised a brow. He projected a hand forward in a sharp gesture towards Sam as he argued, “It seems pretty simple to me. You can’t keep being this hesitant, man. It’s messing with my head. You lure me in just to push me away again and again. I can’t take it anymore.”

Sam ducked his head down. It was so bad. So, so, so, bad. How could protecting Dean cause his brother this much pain? This was the opposite of what he wanted. He didn’t even know what to say.

But apparently Dean did, because he was taking a step forward and jutting his chin out as he looked up at his brother.

“Sam, look at me.” He commanded in a quiet, yet firm voice. 

Sam swallowed and slowly lifted his head up to meet Dean’s eyes. The vulnerability his brother’s intense gaze elicited within him made his heart race. He started pulling at one of the belt loops on his jeans nervously.

Dean took a long, deep breath before placing a hand on the side of Sam’s face. He looked to be gathering courage, what with the intense eye contact, shaky breaths, and bobbing Adam’s apple.

“I’ll make it as easy as I can for you.” He smirked up the tiniest bit, but it was a nervous smile. After a moment, he took another deep breath and retained intense eye contact with Sam as he asked, “Sammy, will you be with me?” 

Sam slammed his eyes shut to hold the floodgates back. He closed his mouth and clenched his jaw to keep himself from collapsing into sobs. Everything in him wanted to scream  _ yes! _ But that would be selfish. Sam had to actively remind himself why he was holding back.

Jess. Sarah. Madison. Amy. Ruby. Eileen. 

He repeated those names over and over again to himself. He  _ refused _ to add Dean to that list. He couldn’t live with himself.

He literally felt his heart shatter into a trillion pieces as he opened his eyes and whispered brokenly, “No.”

Dean let out a shaky breath and turned his back to Sam. He brought a hand up to his face and rubbed it down his jaw as he walked away from his brother. After a few seconds, he turned back around with red rimmed eyes and looked at his brother.

Sam hated himself right now. He  _ hated _ that he made Dean feel this way.

He just had to keep telling himself that heartbroken was better than dead. If it was between Dean hating him, and Dean being dead… that was a damn easy choice to make. Sam had to stand his ground. He was doing this  _ for  _ Dean.

“Is it because we’re brothers?” Dean asked suddenly, voice cracking a bit at first. 

Sam knit his eyebrows. He took a small step forward and shook his head, “What? Dean, no.” 

Dean raised both of his eyebrows and looked down. His irises flicked around for a moment before he looked back up with a devastated expression and shrugged, “Okay. Well then it’s me.”

Oh no, no, no,  _ no _ ! 

“Dean, it’s not you.” Sam immediately denied, using the firmest voice he could. 

No way was Dean making this about him. He didn’t do anything wrong. Sam was the screw up. Sam was always the screw up. 

Dean’s face remained despaired as he waved a hand up in a dismissive gesture and announced brokenly, “I’m not seeing a third option here.” 

Sam shook his head and bit down on his bottom lip. He took a few steps forward to close the distance between them and placed a hand on Dean’s shoulder. His brother immediately shook it off and took a step back, looking both defensive and vulnerable at the same time. Sam let out a breath and allowed his shoulders to fall. 

“It’s not you.” He repeated quietly, eyes downcast and arms slowing crossing in front of his body in self-defense. 

Dean scoffed. He shook his head just the tiniest bit before asking quietly, “Then what, Sam? If it’s not me and it’s not the whole brother thing, then… what?”

Sam just blinked again and turned his head away. This was too damn hard. How was he supposed to tell Dean that the reason he didn’t want to be with him was because he didn’t want to lose him? It didn’t make sense to anyone but Sam. He couldn’t play Russian roulette with Dean’s life. It wasn’t his place to do that. He didn’t  _ want _ to do that. 

He shut himself down. He turned his back to Dean and finally let a tear fall down his cheek. 

Dean was everything he wanted. He loved him more than life itself and all he ever wanted was to be with him. Forever and always. Unconditionally. But he  _ could not _ lose him. He wouldn’t survive. The guilt, the loss, the pain… he couldn’t do any of it. 

Suddenly there was a faint pressure on his cheek and he fluttered his eyes open to see Dean’s watery eyes staring up at him. His brother gently wiped away the stray tear on Sam’s cheek and then kept his palm resting on his jaw. 

With a soft voice that didn’t seem like it could come from such a large and threatening man, he prompted, “Tell me why you don’t want this. I promise I won’t get mad.”

Sam visibly melted. His shoulders caved, his face fell, and his knees practically buckled. Hearing Dean suggest he didn’t  _ want _ this was like a knife in his heart. 

“No, Dean, please,  _ please _ don’t think I don’t want this. I care about you.  _ So much _ . And I… I  _ do _ want to be with you.” He closed his eyes and let out a deep breath as the emotions cascaded over him in a mammoth wave, “But I can’t. I’m sorry. I just… I can’t.”

“Why?” Dean asked in a frustrated and exhausted breath. He pulled his hand away from Sam’s face and looked up at him with an expectant look. 

When no response came from Sam for a good few seconds, Dean added with a much louder voice, “The least you owe me is an explanation.”

“Dean.” Sam shook his head, sucking on the inside of his cheek as he tried to keep himself from just blurting it out, “Please. Just… let it go. It can’t happen, so it’s not going to happen.” 

He knew that he wasn’t going to get out of this without giving Dean a clear, believable answer. He was just trying to buy time to think of one.

“Sam, you owe me this!” 

Sam actually jerked back a bit. He didn’t expect Dean to yell so loud. It was like he finally snapped and any semblance of patience was gone. 

“I have been  _ nothing _ but patient with you, and all you give me is this crap?!” He accused, stepping into Sam’s space and shoving his chest, “All the excuses, and the deflections, and the refusals! I’m so tired of being played with like a fucking puppet! Man up and tell me the truth. You owe me that!” 

Sam scrunched up his eyebrows, narrowing his eyes a bit as he felt the embarrassment and guilt settle like a lead ball in his gut. Dean was  _ right _ . He just… he didn’t know how to say it.

“I know, I just…” Sam whispered so softly Dean had to lean in to hear it. 

“You just what?” Dean asked, sounding very impatient. 

“Once I say it, it’s real.” He said before he could even think about it. He sort of surprised himself, “It’ll be over.”

That thought made his chest hurt. Once he told Dean his final ‘no’, this was all over. No more longing glances, no more stolen kisses. No potential for anything more. Nothing. He didn’t want it to end, he really didn’t. Somehow not saying it made him feel better. But he knew that Dean would never let it go unless he heard the truth. 

“Sam.” Dean clenched his jaw and spoke in the saddest, most devastated voice Sam’s ever heard, “It’s already over, man.” 

Sam’s eyes immediately welled up with tears and he had to swallow down the lump forming in his throat. Those words were a million times worse than any physical blow. 

“You made that choice.” Dean added after a moment, his voice still fragile and withdrawn. 

Sam turned back to him, thinking ‘what the hell’. It was now or never. No point in hiding it now.

”I know.” He whispered as he met Dean’s eyes. He sighed and shivered a bit as he spoke firmly, “Because I don’t want you to die.”

Dean jutted his head back, eyebrows coming together like that was the last thing on earth he expected to hear. 

“What?” He asked, confusion all over his face. 

Sam pulled a hand up to his face and wiped it over his eyes, briefly pinching the bridge of his nose. He pulled it away after a moment and walked away from Dean. He needed to sit down. Dean followed him close behind as he made it to the main table and took a seat in one of the chairs. 

“Dean.” He started slowly, quietly, “Being with me is a death sentence, don’t you get that?” 

He looked at his brother with wet eyes, silently begging him to understand. To not make this more difficult than it has to be. 

“What are you talking about?” Dean asked, and the frustration was gone from his voice now.

He seemed to have realized somewhere along the line that this was a serious issue for Sam. His body language shifted from defensive and stand-offish to more open and comforting. His voice was more patient, more soft. It was a radical and fast change that confused Sam a bit, but then again, when he was in peril, Dean’s big brother instincts kicked in. And right now, he was in some serious,  _ serious _ emotional peril. It was surely all over his face. So, Dean was putting aside his pain for the moment to focus on helping Sam through his. Just like always. 

“Everyone I’ve ever been with is dead.” Sam told him, watching Dean’s eyes and waiting for the realization to hit him. 

But Dean just knit his eyebrows together and looked down for a moment, as if he was calculating. When he looked back up, his lips were drawn in a tight frown.

“That’s not true.” He argued, eyes squinting.

Sam huffed out a humorless laugh and shook his head before combating, “Yes, it is.”

Dean shook his head and sat up, straightening out his back and leaning over the table, “No, Sam, tha-”

Sam leaned back against his chair as he cut Dean off, slowly listing out all of the names, “Jessica. Madison. Sarah. Amy. Eileen. Ruby.” 

Sam tried his best to ignore the little flinch Dean gave at the fourth name.

“They’re all dead.” He ended, feeling the emotions resurface as he voiced it out loud for the first time. He licked his lips a bit and shifted in his seat, waiting for Dean’s response.

But his brother looked genuinely surprised. His lips were parted just barely and his jaw was clenched tight. His eyebrows drooped down in a concerned look that pulled right at Sam’s heartstrings. It took him a solid few seconds to speak.

“Sam, none of that was your fault.” He assured quietly, keeping a careful gaze on his brother.

Sam tilted his head and sighed, “Maybe. But  _ it is _ my problem.  _ It is _ my burden to bear.” 

“Wait. Hang on.” Dean held a hand up as he narrowed his brows. A look of shock and realization suddenly took over his face. He dropped his hand and made dead eye contact with Sam as he asked slowly, “Is that why you don’t want to be with me? Because you think I’ll end up like them?” 

Sam clenched his jaw and turned his head away from Dean.

Dean took the body language as a yes and started speaking, “Sam, that’s ridiculous.” 

Sam turned back to Dean with a solemn expression.

“Everybody that I’ve ever been with is gone. It’s like I’m cursed, or something. The people I love… they all end up dead. I can’t…” His voice cracked and he took a deep breath before looking to Dean with laser focused eyes, “That can’t happen to you.” 

Dean’s shoulders sank and his name was like a prayer falling from his lips, “ _ Sammy _ .”

“I’m sorry, but it’s for your own good.” Sam sat up straight, pushing back the emotions and refocusing on  _ why _ he had to do this, “It’s safer for you to just stay away from me. Keep this platonic. That way I’m not putting the one person I love most in this world in danger.”

He had to avoid eye contact because it was too hard to think logically while looking into Dean’s eyes. When he looked into those deep greens, everything else just faded away and he lost track of why them being together was a bad idea. He lost control of his mind and just wanted to be right up against Dean’s chest, kissing him senseless. 

And he  _ couldn’t _ lose himself right now. So he kept peering down.

He swallowed and stared at his own calloused palms, studying the way his fingers spread and how broken his fingernails were. He was waiting patiently for Dean to speak up, listening to the deafening sound of his own heart pulsing in his ears. It was thunderingly loud and lightning fast. All he could focus on. 

Which is why he jumped a fucking foot when there was suddenly a hand on his cheek. He jerked his head up and saw that Dean was now kneeling beside him, looking up at him with an emotion in his eyes Sam couldn’t quite identify. The younger Winchester relaxed a bit when he saw it was just Dean. The contact had spooked him like hell. But… what surprised him even more was that Dean didn’t look mad. His lips were pulled up in a tight smile and his eyes were watering, but… not mad. 

Sam gritted his teeth together and hesitantly leaned into his brother’s hand. 

“Little brother, you are the  _ dumbest _ smart person in the world.” Dean laughed a little, mouth opening up in a real, true smile with teeth and everything.

Sam’s heart swelled, but he couldn’t get caught up in it.

“What?” He asked, face screwed tight in confusion and leftover despair from his confession.

Dean swiped his thumb gently over Sam’s stubbled jaw and elaborated, “The bad guys already know we’re each other’s weakness, Sammy. Us being brothers puts us both at risk as it is. And look, I know that the romantic side of things hasn’t always been easier for you. Hell, that’s an understatement. But… I won’t leave you. Not until I have no other option. I promise you that.”

Sam sucked his lips into his mouth and tilted his head a bit, denying, “I don’t know, it feels different.”

Dean shook his head, the desperation coming off of him in waves.

“We’re already in this together, Sam.” Dean leveled with him, reaching up to take his hand in his own, “Way I see it, we may as well take the full plunge.” 

Sam still wasn’t sure. All of his lasting hookups, with the exception of Amelia, ended up dead. It was different then just being Dean’s brother. He couldn’t articulate why, but it was. It felt riskier, somehow.

“ _ Dean… _ ” He whispered, the tone of his voice carrying denial.

“ _ Sam _ .” Dean said back, mocking his brother’s tone. 

Sam tilted his head, unamused.

“Listen to me.” Dean instructed softly, “I am so sorry about all of the women you’ve been with that have died, Sam. It sucks. But none of their deaths were your fault. And you know what? I’d like to think that I can handle myself a little bit better than any of them could. Plus, would it really hurt all that much more losing me if we were closer? I think it’d hurt pretty damn bad either way, kiddo. But on the other hand… we do this? We’ll be happier, Sam. So much happier. Don’t the pros outweigh the cons?”

It was a convincing argument, but it was one that Sam had to think about. He sighed and started playing with his fingers nervously, sliding his knuckles against each other and listening to the clacking noises they made when the bones clashed. 

“You just gotta stop thinking so hard.” Dean told him after a minute. He gently placed his right hand on top of Sam’s fidgeting ones, bringing them to a halt, “Ask yourself right now, what do you want? If you didn’t have any worries, or past tragedies, or guilt. What would you want to be doing at this very moment?” 

Sam swallowed hard. The fear crept in and wouldn’t release him, wrapping like a coiled snake around his throat. But it wasn’t because of Dean or the thought of him dying. No… it was because Sam knew exactly what he would want to be doing right now if it weren’t for his fear, and it scared the crap out of him. 

He didn’t know why, but he brought his gaze back to his brother’s and locked their stares. He felt himself go weak in the knees, a warmth spreading from his chest outwards. Nothing else existed when they were looking at each other like this. Sam should close his eyes or turn away, but he just couldn’t bring himself too. For a brief second, he flicked his gaze down to Dean’s full lips. He brought his stare back up just as quick, but judging by the way Dean’s pupils dilated, he wasn’t nearly as subtle as he thought he was. 

“Doesn’t matter.” Sam whispered breathlessly. 

Dean shook his head just the slightest bit and urged again, “It matters a lot, Sam.”

The younger Winchester just swallowed nervously as he kept looking down at Dean. His heart was racing in his chest and there was sweat gathering on the surface of his palms. 

“Let it go.” Dean instructed after a moment. He raised up on his knees and scooted closer to Sam. He gently placed a hand on his brother’s thigh before repeating, “Just let it all go, Sammy.”

Sam found his body subconsciously leaning in towards Dean, the warmth and pressure on his thigh intoxicating, but his brain caught up with him just in time to yank him back. He shook his head and cleared his throat, breathing out through his nose.

“No. No.” He denied, more trying to convince himself than Dean, “If anything were to happen to you-”

“You’d do what you always do. You’d find a way to save me. And I for you.” Dean cut him off, his voice dripping patience, “No matter if we’re brothers or… more… we’ll still look out for each other, right?” 

It was a rhetorical question, but Sam answered nonetheless, “Always.”

Dean gave him a little smirk and squeezed his thigh gingerly, “Exactly. So just… let it go. Let it all go, Sam. The worry, the fear, the guilt… just let it go.  _ Be with me _ .”

Sam’s eyes softened and he took a deep breath as he finally let himself truly listen to Dean. Maybe he was right. Maybe they were doomed either way. 

All he knew was that right now, staring into Dean’s eyes and feeling his hand on his thigh, there was only one thing in the world he wanted. Free will was slipping out of him and as his eyes followed Dean’s tongue as it slid across his bottom lip, he took a shuddering breath and thought  _ fuck it _ .

He leaned forward and pressed his mouth to Dean’s. 

Their lips met and the entire world stopped turning. Dean’s hand froze on his brother’s thigh and Sam felt the breath escape from his nose and cascade over his upper lip. He closed his eyes and stayed there for a moment, his heart racing in his chest and pulse thunderingly loud in his ears. His hands were shaking and his body felt electric. It felt weird and new and unnatural. There was no movement, no drive, no passion. It was just… pressure. Surprise.

When he realized that Dean had yet to return the kiss or even move at all, he backed off. He pulled backwards until their faces were mere inches apart.

When he slowly opened his eyes, the first thing he saw was Dean staring back at him with wide, surprised eyes and parted lips. There was a light flush on his cheeks and his pupils were dilated so much that the green was almost gone. There was a pregnant pause as they both stared at each other, their heavy breaths audible and both of their hearts booming away. It was so intense that gravity felt heavier on Sam’s shoulders. His stomach was sinking as every second passed. 

And then Dean surged forward.

He brought both of his hands up almost on reflex, resting them on the back of Sam’s head and entangling his fingers in his thick hair. He held his head so strong and tightly that the younger Winchester whimpered and leaned into the pressure. He slammed his eyes closed and lost all of his breath when Dean swept his tongue over the seam of his mouth. Sam reacted immediately, pressing into Dean’s mouth a bit harder and then pulling away to nip at Dean’s bottom lip. It felt way different than the first kiss. It was hot and desperate. Urgent. The passion he was missing at first was all there now, and it was rough and lovely and intense. It was everything he wanted and he finally allowed himself to let go, like Dean had been begging him to.

When they broke apart again to catch their breath and look at eachother, it was almost like a magnetic feeling. The longer they weren’t connected, the more they craved each other. So Sam closed his eyes and tipped his head back until Dean got the message and kissed him again. This time it was slower, sweeter. But just as, if not more, passionate. They kept their lips glued until it was nothing but chaste brushes of lips. Dean's hold in his hair gentled and his fingers simply started caressing over Sam's cheeks and jaw, his warm hands settling on the sides of his neck.

“Fuck.” Dean slurred into the kiss, and Sam opened his mouth to take Dean's tongue in and suck on it. Dean groaned, his hands sliding down, holding Sam by the biceps and pulling him in. He slowly moved up until he was standing and then slid directly into Sam’s lap so he was straddling him- never breaking the kiss. Sam gasped and brought his hands up to rest on Dean’s back, holding him tightly and flexing his fingers to grip at his shirt. 

As Sam pulled away just a few centimeters to catch his breath, he spoke softly, ''I've wanted to do this forever.”

Dean gave him an earth shattering smile and then he was pulling Sam into another deep kiss. Their noses brushed and they laughed, Dean leaning in to kiss him again. The minutes passed and Sam felt his lips growing swollen and tender, but he kept kissing Dean. No way could he stop now. 

They kissed for so long that Sam lost track of time, both of them breathing into each other's mouths and running hands over their bodies. It was intoxicating in a way Sam had never experienced. 

The feel of Dean’s body in his lap and his lips against his mouth was just… fuck.

“I am so incredibly fucked.” Sam laughed breathlessly as he pulled away from Dean’s mouth and simply rested their foreheads against each other

Dean hummed and gave Sam a subtle eskimo kiss.

“Why’s that?” He asked, voice strained and breathless.

Sam swallowed and laughed, “Well, for one, I’m ruined forever for anybody else, now.” 

Dean smiled and soothed his hand down Sam’s arm, “Good.”

“Good?”

“Yeah.” Dean pecked his lips before pulling away and elaborating, “Just you and me from here on out.” 

Sam felt his heart seize. 

“Really?” He asked, trying to keep the hope out of his voice.

Dean just squeezed his forearm and assured, “Really.”

Sam jutted his chin out so that their lips met again. Dean sighed and relaxed into the kiss, gently rubbing his fingers along Sam’s arm as their lips parted and weaved with each other. It was nice, and warm, and homely. Familiar in a way it shouldn’t be. 

As they kept moving against each other, Sam was quickly becoming aware of another problem. There was a dull, firm pressure rubbing against his pelvis. At first he was confused, trying to figure out what it was, but when he finally realized what it was, his heart skipped a beat. Dean’s hard dick was pressing into him. Sam’s heartbeat started picking up pace and his cheeks grew red in arousal and surprise. But it wasn’t because of Dean, no… it was because he could feel a very similar hardness straining against his own zipper. Surely Dean could feel it too. 

They were barely even touching each other down there, and yet they were both rock hard. 

“Dean.” Sam breathed out against his brother’s lips, trying to gain his attention. When it didn’t work, he repeated a little louder. “Dean.”

His brother finally pulled back a little, hair messy and eyes dazed. He licked his lips as he snapped out of it and questioned quietly, “What?” 

Sam held his breath as he made a bold move. He reached down and placed his palm over Dean’s bulge, just keeping a dull pressure over it. His brother melted like jello at the touch. He let out a strangled groan and leaned forward into Sam, eyes rolling a bit into his head and breath catching. He tried to drive his hips into Sam’s hand to get more friction, but Sam kept him where he was.

“You wanna take this somewhere with a bed?” Sam asked wistfully, licking his lips and trying to control his own thundering pulse. 

Dean gave him a look that was half hunger and half adoration. He gripped Sam’s jaw in his hand and swiveled his hips a bit as he asked breathlessly, “Are you sure? There’s no rush Sam, we just figured this out.”

Sam rolled his eyes. Of course his brother was gonna get all sweet now. Damn him. He didn’t want  _ sweet _ . Sam slapped Dean’s knee gently and told him with a firm, teasing voice, “Get off of me.”

Dean did as told, hopping off of Sam’s lap before turning back and reaching for his hand. Sam grabbed his brother’s outstretched palm and then Dean was dragging him at record speed towards his bedroom. 

All fears and worries were gone, and all Sam could think was  _ Dean, Dean, Dean…  _

Sam pushed his brother into the room and slammed the door behind them. Before he even fully turned around, Dean was on top of him, pushing his back into the closed door and pinning him against it. He devoured Sam’s mouth like that, holding his forearms back and licking along his bottom lip.

The noises they made verged on animalistic. 

“Bed,  _ now _ .” Dean demanded against Sam’s lips and then the two of them were stumbling over to the mattress. 

Sam pushed Dean down so he was on his back and then moved forward on his knees until he was straddling his brother. He experimentally grinded his hips down so that their clothed cocks rubbed against each other and they both moaned. 

“God, the things you do to me.” Dean groaned as he reached up and grabbed the back of Sam’s head, pulling him down until their lips crashed together again. 

It was rapid and intense. Their teeth brushed forcefully against each other and before Sam could even think, he was looking at Dean with lustful eyes and humming, “Just getting started.” 

Dean visibly shivered and then he was swallowing and reaching for the sleeves of Sam’s flannel.

“I need this off, yesterday.” He growled and Sam nodded, sitting straight up again to shrug off his flannel and then grabbing the hem of the tee underneath and yanking it over his head.

Dean felt himself grow impossibly harder as he took in the sight of his brother shirtless. His breath caught in his throat and he groaned, “Fuck, Sam. You're gorgeous…  _ shit _ .”

He ran open palms down the defined lines of Sam’s abs and skirted his fingertips over the distinct V shape of his pelvis. 

“I can’t believe this is finally happening.” Dean whispered in awe, eyes lit up like a toddler on Christmas. 

Sam smiled and was about to return the sentiment, but then he was interrupting himself with a low purr when Dean’s fingers trailed over the line just above his jeans. He swallowed down the arousal and pushed Dean’s hand away. 

“Your turn.” He instructed before reaching for Dean’s shirts and helping get rid of all the superfluous fabric. His own breath caught as he looked down at his brother’s bare chest. 

Sam immediately leaned down and placed his lips to his brother's hard nipple. He teased it relentlessly by sucking, nipping and flicking it with his talented tongue. 

Dean was giving little hiccuped breaths and thrusting his hips up into nothing as the arousal pooled in his gut. He weaved his fingers in Sam’s hair and held his brother's head to his chest, whimpering, " _ Sammm _ ." 

His chest rose and fell heavily with the added sexual stimulation. In a matter of seconds, Sam moved to his other nipple and gave it fair treatment. He licked over the hardening mound and scraped at it gently with his teeth, leaving Dean writhing below him. 

“Sammy… fuck, I need…” Dean couldn’t articulate what he needed, so he just huffed and used his free hand to reach down and unbuckle his belt. He sighed out in relief as he loosened his jeans enough to at least get his dick out of the tight confinement it was in before. 

Sam immediately took advantage of his brother’s move and placed his hand directly over Dean's boxer covered erection and Dean moaned.  _ Loud _ . He nearly came undone just from that initial touch. Sam grinned against his nipple as Dean tried to hide his face from Sam.

"It's okay, Dean." Sam whispered as he moved up his body to eskimo kiss him, palm still resting on Dean’s erection. 

Dean furrowed his brows in arousal and swallowed before reaching for Sam’s jeans and unzipping them. He was sick of being pampered. He needed to get Sam as desperate as he was. Without any hesitation, Dean slid his hand right into Sam’s boxers and encircled his cock. Sam’s elbows almost gave out. He huffed out a breath and squinted his eyes. 

“Fucking hell, little brother’s not so little.” Dean laughed in awe as his fingers wrapped around Sam’s thick length. 

Sam wasn’t even hearing him. The friction was so good, but it wasn’t enough. With a shaky arm, he reached down and pressed his own hand over his brother's, forcing it tighter around his cock. 

“Just like that." He breathed.

Sam leaned down for a kiss while Dean started stroking his brother's very hard dick up and down. Every time he twisted his wrist, Sam whined a beautiful noise that made Dean melt. Sam shifted his own hand so it was inside Dean's underwear. He noticed Dean was a little wet from leaking pre-cum and fuck if that wasn’t the hottest thing in the world… Sam pulled his brother's underwear and jeans off entirely, Dean raising his hips to help him along. 

“God, look at you.” Sam groaned low as his eyes flicked over Dean’s naked form. He bit his lip and breathed deep.

“Not fair. No ogling me until I can return the favor.” Dean argued, pointing to Sam’s jeans like they were the devil himself. 

Sam laughed and raised himself enough to slip out of his jeans and briefs. Dean was right… his brother was big. Really big. 

“Hung like a horse, Jesus, Sam.” He acknowledged, whistling low. Dean thought he was a good size, but… God, he was kind of stunned by Sam’s length. Nothing else seemed big anymore.

Sam smirked a little and positioned himself on top of Dean again, straddling his waist. 

“How did all those little ladies handle you?” Dean asked, covering it as a joke but he was genuinely curious. He gently smoothed his palm over Sam’s ass as he continued, “Surprised I’ve never seen a woman leave not knowing how to walk. Fuck.” 

Sam laughed a little and an embarrassed flush came over his cheeks. He cleared his throat and shrugged.

“Urgh… well…”

Dean raised a brow, “What?”

Sam winced a little as he admitted, “There was kind of a… walk.” 

Dean looked at Sam curiously as he prompted, “A walk?”

“Yeah.” Sam cringed, raising a brow, “Like a… I just rode a horse… kinda thighs spread, waddle type thing. Jess always kinda walked funny the morning after, but she got… used to it after a while.” 

Dean took on a shiteating grin and he looked down at Sam’s member, “I can see why.” 

Sam blushed and looked away.

“Alright. Well, I suppose I’ll have to show those ladies how it’s done.”

Sam’s eyes widened and he raised his brows. The surprise was all over his face and in his voice when he asked breathlessly, “You wanna bottom?” 

Dean pushed his bottom lip out and asked nonchalantly, “Problem?”

Sam jerked his head back just the slightest bit and opened and closed his mouth a few times like a fish gulping for air. He shook his head and snapped out of it, stuttering, “No… no, not at all. I just… I’m just surprised.” 

Which was true. Dean didn’t seem like the type to want to be in that position. He didn’t seem like the receiving type. He was the _giver_. And Sam was perfectly fine with that. He didn’t exactly mind getting filled in that way. If that was how Dean wanted it, he would’ve happily complied. He would’ve ridden his brother like a fucking bull until climax. But… he also loved being able to dominate someone. He would rather it, honestly. He adored feeling a tight body around him. Making someone feel him _inside_ of them. The noises they’d make. The way they’d beg for it. He loved knowing he was giving someone else pleasure. He loved taking charge. Setting the pace. It was one of the only times Sam felt completely in control. He just assumed that Dean felt the same way. So when he said he would bottom, Sam was surprised, but… pleasantly so.

“Only a real man can take it up the ass, Sammy. Nothing wrong with wanting it.” Dean said so casually that Sam huffed out a surprised laugh. He half-expected Dean to say it was feminine or unmanly to have another guy penetrate him. Say that it would make him ‘the girl.’ It was quite the opposite, however, and that made Sam happy.

He placed open mouth kisses along Dean’s jawline, so turned on by Dean’s words he was losing his mind. He wanted this to escalate. 

“No, there’s definitely not.” Sam smiled and grinded down a bit so that their cocks rubbed alongside one another. Both men shuddered and gasped. 

With Dean’s (indirect) permission to take charge of the situation, Sam trailed his lips up to Dean’s ear and nibbled gently at the lobe. Dean let out a shaky breath and then Sam was whispering right into his ear.

“Think you can handle it, big brother?”

Dean made an unearthly noise as he caught his breath. He dug his fingernails into Sam’s shoulder blade as he whimpered, “ _ Yes _ .” 

Sam smiled again, but then another thought hit him and he swallowed down the teasing. He loved the way this turned somewhat rough and passionate, but he needed to make sure Dean knew he wouldn’t do anything to hurt him. Not now, and not ever.

“Are you sure?” He asked softly, pulling back to look Dean in the eyes and running his fingers through his short hair, “Like you said, I’m not exactly small. I don’t want to hurt you.”

Dean’s eyes softened and he took a deep breath. He reached up to brush Sam’s cheek with a shaky hand.

“You won’t.” Dean assured him wholeheartedly, “You could never hurt me. We’ll take it slow, okay?” 

Sam nodded and clenched his jaw, “You ever done this before? I mean…”

“Anal?” Dean filled in with a raised brow and Sam nodded.

“Twice. Remember that bartender back in Leominster?” Dean shivered over-exaggeratedly in a gesture, “She was into some freaky things, Sammy boy.”

Sam didn’t love that word. It made him feel like Dean thought this -what they were about to do- was weird. 

“Freaky?” He asked quietly, pinching his lips a bit.

Dean could tell the word bothered Sam, but he didn’t apologize for it. Instead, he made it better by elaborating.

“Freaky, but amazing.” He affirmed excitedly, “Best orgasm I’ve ever had.” 

Sam raised both brows and smirked. The words were flying out of his mouth before he could stop them.

“Sounds like a challenge.”

Dean’s eyes dilated even further and his dick became impossibly more erect. He groaned out and gritted his teeth, reflexively jerking his hips up in search of friction, “Fuck, Sammy. You can’t say shit like that.” 

Sam laughed and then dropped his hips to meet Dean’s. He felt his body electrify when his hard cock nestled beside his brothers. Hot flesh against hot flesh. They both shuddered at the intense contact and Sam slowly began dragging his hips along Dean’s, building the friction. Dean started swiveling his own hips and together they formed a smooth rhythm.

They looked into each other's eyes the whole time, studying the need and love being reflected back at them. Both of their mouths were open and both of their eyebrows were furrowed in pleasure. 

Their heated breath was mixing in the air and soon Sam was biting down gingerly on Dean’s lip to get his attention. He kept rocking his hips gently as he asked, “Lube?”

“Skip it.” Dean whispered into his mouth, delirious with desire, “We got spit and precum.” 

Sam immediately pulled away.

“No way am I fucking you on spit the first time you take me. I’ll hurt you.” He explained breathlessly, his face hanging mere inches above Dean’s, “Come on, you have to have some. Where is it?”

Sam gently held Dean’s hair out of his face as he patiently awaited an answer, their hips still moving in a slow grind.

“Okay, okay. Fine.” Dean grumbled before rolling his eyes and pointing to the nightstand, “Bottom drawer.”

Sam smiled and leaned down to peck Dean’s lips before shifting his body so he could reach for the nightstand. Dean audibly whined when Sam had to stop moving his hips to grab the lube, instantly missing the friction. 

Sam laughed a little at Dean’s reaction, and when he returned to his prior position, he had lube in his hand and a sly smile on his face. He leaned down and pressed a kiss to the tip of Dean’s nose before pulling away and whispering, “Patience.”

He then poured a generous amount of lube over his index finger and looked at Dean for affirmation before moving any further. When his brother gave him a curt nod, Sam lowered his hand to his brother’s ass and slowly slipped his fingertip inside. Dean’s breath caught and Sam felt his body tense around him.

Sam cooed gently, grabbing firmly onto Dean’s hip, thumb slipping into the divot of his hip bone, “Dean, breathe.”

Dean looked surprised when he inhaled, as if just now realizing that he had stopped. He swallowed nervously and visibly relaxed. Sam smiled just the tiniest bit.

With Dean’s body relaxed, he was able to carefully glide his finger in and out until he could make it all the way to the last knuckle. He paused when his index was fully seated, looking up at Dean for any signs of discomfort.

Dean was mewling at the welcome intrusion, eyes closed and mouth open The pressure was not quite pleasant yet, but not painful either. Just a bit weird. He instinctively lifted his legs, a blush creeping onto his cheeks. Sam gently brushed his thumb over Dean’s hip bone, keeping him steady and grounded. He started slowly pulling his finger out all the way to the nail, and then all the way back in. He kept going until the glide felt easy, the lube slippery and warming up. Sam kept his finger inside of Dean and started making a beckoning motion with his finger as he rose up and over Dean’s body. He used his forearm to keep himself balanced as he started dropping messy, open mouth kisses to Dean’s jaw. 

When the pad of his finger rubbed over Dean’s prostate, his brother yelped. His upper body arched up and his lips quivered. He clearly wasn’t expecting it. Sam laughed and did it again, relishing in the way Dean writhed.

“Holy shit.” Dean gasped, grabbing onto Sam’s shoulders and digging his fingernails in.

Sam smirked and kissed Dean briefly. He slowly slid his finger out of Dean’s body 

“No, don’t stop.” Dean all but whined, opening his eyes and looking up at Sam like he’d stabbed him. His desperate and aroused expression made Sam smile. 

He leaned down and placed a kiss to Dean’s forehead, “Calm down, I’m just gonna add another finger. I’m not stopping.”

Dean lowered his head back to the pillow and nodded, sighing, “Okay. Yeah, good.”

Sam grabbed the bottle of lube and added some to both his index and middle finger. He rubbed it between his fingers and got it nice and warm. With a deep breath, he told Dean, “It’s gonna stretch more now. Tell me if it’s too much.”

Dean nodded, and then Sam was pumping his fingers into his warm body. He got them into the first knuckle, and then had to pull out and pump them back in again to get to the second. He rocked his fingers in and out for a few seconds before they slid all the way in. Dean shivered and moaned, toes curling a bit and eyes fluttering closed at the feeling. 

“Okay?” Sam asked, keeping his fingers still to let Dean adjust.

Dean nodded rapidly, breathlessly pleading, “Keep going.”

Sam started scissoring the two fingers inside of Dean, drawing them together as he slid them out and spreading them wide when he pushed them back in. Every little sound that fell from Dean’s lips was liquid sex, and it was making Sam almost painfully hard. 

“I love the noises you make.” He told Dean directly, burying his face in the crook of his brother’s neck and kissing down the line of his throat. 

“I feel…” Dean paused to catch his breath when Sam sucked hard on his pulsepoint. He squeezed Sam’s shoulders and whimpered, “I feel like a real asshole, Sammy.” 

Sam had to stop himself from saying  _ No, I feel the real asshole _ . It wasn’t the right time for cracking jokes.

“Why’s that?” He asked instead, right up against Dean’s neck.

Dean’s breath hitched.

“Because you’re making me feel like this.” He shuddered a bit and swallowed before continuing, “And I’m not giving you shit in return.” He bit his lip when Sam’s fingers crossed inside of him, finishing his thought with a gasp, “It’s ungentlemanly.” 

Sam raised his brows and let go of Dean’s neck so he could bring his head up and look at his brother’s face. 

“Believe me, this is doing something to me too.” He announced, jerking his head down a bit in a gesture towards his rock hard dick. Dean’s eyes widened just the slightest bit and Sam licked his lips, “And like you care about being  _ gentlemanly _ .”

There was a pause that followed, and then the sound of the lube bottle popping open. 

''God, Sammy, I’ve wanted you so bad for so long.” Dean gasped wantonly as his brother pushed a third finger in and started fucking him with it, meanwhile sinking down and scattering kisses up his thighs. Dean writhed, lifting his ass up and whimpering.

“Me too, Dean, me too. Believe me.” Sam told him as he continued pumping his fingers in and out. He gently brought a hand down and placed it over his own dick to give himself some relief. The pressure made it easier to breathe. 

“Enough of this, baby.” Dean whined and thrusted up into Sam’s hand, “I want your dick.” 

Sam stuttered at that. Number one, the use of the pet name ‘baby’ did all kinds of things to him, and number two, Dean begging for his dick was the hottest thing on planet earth.

But he knew he was big. Bigger than three fingers. The most important thing here was not hurting Dean.

“One more.” He whispered, heart pounding, “One more and then it’s all me.” 

Dean whined a bit, but threw his head back with a moan when Sam lubed his hand up even more and put the fourth finger in alongside the rest. It was an intense stretch, but Sam was being really, really careful. He was taking his time and being patient with Dean, not adding fingers until he was 100% sure he was ready. 

He fucked him on four fingers for a minute or so, purposefully avoiding Dean’s prostate to build the arousal and anticipation. 

“Okay.” Sam whispered softly as he pulled his fingers out of Dean slowly, his brother hissing at the loss.

Sam moved up and stretched over Dean, chest heaving as he breathed heavily. He looked down at Dean’s face and reached over to grab the condom he’d gotten out along with the lube. He picked it up between two fingers and inspected it. He knew the brand, and it wasn’t big enough. He groaned.

“Do you have any magnums?” He asked breathlessly, head spinning and body buzzing.

Dean took a second to clear his head, and then he swallowed and told him sarcastically and flatly, “No, I don’t have any magnums, because I don’t have a baseball bat for a cock, Sam”

Sam cursed under his breath and rolled his eyes. Then he shook his head, “I have some in my room.”

He moved to get up, but Dean grabbed his forearm and pulled him back down. 

“Stay.” 

“Dean, I have to wear a condom.” He argued like it was the simplest thing in the world.

“No, you don’t.” Dean combatted, “I always suit up, and I  _ know _ you do too. I’m clean, I promise. It’s just us from now on, let’s just…”

“Go bare?” Sam finished, eyebrows raised and heart pounding.

Dean shrugged a bit, “I mean…” 

“Okay.” Sam agreed.

Dean looked surprised. He asked, “Yeah?”

Sam nodded, “Yeah. You’re right.”

Dean stared up at Sam, and then all of a sudden reality hit the two of them. They were about to do this. The lust filled their eyes and their bodies craved one another. Sam swallowed and repositioned himself on top of Dean. He wrapped a hand around one of Dean’s thighs and brought it up and out of the way. He spread Dean’s legs and kissed his cheek.

“Are you ready?” He breathed out, eyes dark and chest heaving. He licked his bottom lip, and Dean would rather die than say no to that face.

He nodded eagerly, tightening his hand in Sam’s hair and whispered desperately, “Please.” 

“Okay.” Sam acknowledged, using one hand to gently guide his dick to Dean’s hole. His brother jumped and his breath hitched when the head of his cock hit Dean’s entrance. 

“Just focus on breathing, Dean.” Sam told him soothingly, running his free hand through Dean’s hair, “Just breathe.”

Dean nodded and clenched his teeth as Sam slowly started pushing in. The initial breach had his jaw dropping and he slammed his eyes closed. Four inches in, Sam paused and waited for Dean to loosen up a bit to continue.

“Tell me when.” He told Dean, squinting hard and biting his lip to keep himself from thrusting all the way in in one move. It felt so good, but he had to be mindful of Dean.

His brother immediately nodded, “You can go more.” 

Sam swallowed and slowly pushed in a little further. Another inch, and Dean whined, moving his hand down to wrap around his dick. He slowly started stroking himself as Sam continued pushing in, little by little. The pain caused by Sam’s massive cock being shoved in his hole was somewhat balanced by how good it felt to touch himself. It was also knowing that Sam wouldn’t hurt him.

“ _ Fuck _ .” Dean cursed, head thrown back and body tense.

“You okay?” Sam asked, trying desperately to concentrate on his brother despite the pleasure swarming his lower region.

Dean took a few seconds to breathe in and breathe out before nodding and acknowledging, “I’m okay. How much more, baby?” 

He was biting his lip hard and stroking his dick fast, trying to concentrate on the good things. The stretch was burning his lower half. It felt like his ass was splitting into a new crack. He didn’t know how much more he could handle. 

“Three inches, probably,” Sam told him, wincing a bit at how much more that probably was for Dean, “If you need to stop…”

“No, no.” Dean shook his head. He wanted this. He wanted Sam. He just needed distractions, so he pleaded, “Just…  _ kiss me _ .”

Sam didn’t need to be told twice. He leaned down and took Dean’s bottom lip, which was red and swollen from him biting on it, between his. He soothed his tongue over the raw flesh and hummed into Dean’s mouth when he felt his brother tangle his fingers in his hair. 

Without warning, he moved a hand down to Dean’s hip and while kissing him, thrusted the rest of the way in. Dean’s shout was muffled against his mouth, but there was the unmistakable taste of a salty tear suddenly in Sam’s mouth. He didn’t pull back. Instead, he kept soothing Dean with gentle touches of his hands and continued kissing him. He knew that no matter what, this first time was going to hurt for Dean. He just wanted to make the pain as minimal as humanly possible. They would get to the pleasure soon, he just needed to give his brother time to adjust.

When Sam pulled away from his mouth and looked down at Dean, his brother’s eyes were opened and dilated. He could see the pain behind those green irises, and reached out to stroke his brother’s cheek.

“You okay?” He asked softly, being completely serious for the moment.

Dean took a second to think about that question. His ass was on fire, but his dick felt good and he was so awed and admirative of Sam that his body felt tingly. 

“Just need a second.” He told Sam honestly, knitting his eyebrows as he waited for the pain to dull, “It’s so fucking deep. Never had anything this deep before.”

“Sorry.” Sam whispered, feeling guilt flood his body, “It’d be easier if I was… smaller.”

Dean immediately shook his head, “Stop it, you’re perfect.”

He said it so nonchalantly, Sam felt like he shouldn’t have had the reaction he did. His heart fluttered and his eyes stung with tears. He literally had to stop himself from crying. Hearing those words from Dean was all he ever wanted.

“Let me know when you want me to move. No rush.” Sam noticed his own voice sounded wrecked. Why wouldn’t it? He was only making love to his older brother. That's when it hit him. The look on Dean’s face and the feeling inside his own chest. This was way more than he ever expected. Not an hour ago he was ready to put the idea of them being together away forever.

Dean pulled Sam down for a kiss after a moment and encouraged, "I'm okay. You can move."

Sam kissed his brother's forehead, caressing his face gently as he slowly started to move his hips. He kept his eyes on Dean the whole time, watching for any signs of pain.

At first, he just started grinding a bit, swiveling his hips just barely to let Dean’s body adjust to the intrusion. He was sure that even the small, slow movements felt huge to Dean by the way his brother was whimpering. He waited until the little pained lines between Dean’s eyebrows disappeared to start making bolder moves. He held Dean’s hips tight as he slowly pulled out two inches or so, and then pushed back in. Dean’s breath hitched and Sam reached down to replace Dean’s hand on his cock with his own, stroking fast and hoping the pleasure there would help him along. 

Dean let out a low moan when Sam’s thumb flicked over the head of his dick at the same time he thrust back in. His dick was at a great angle for both of them. 

Sam paused after a moment and leaned down to kiss his older brother. He was so amazed by how wonderfully and calmly Dean was taking him. It was impressive and it only made him love him more. He grunted out loud as his dick pushed back in, eyes closing at the pleasure coursing through him. 

Dean moaned and grabbed at Sam’s hips, “Oh God,  _ please  _ keep making those noises, Sammy. Don’t hold back on me.  _ Ever _ .”

Dean then got a hold of himself enough to pull Sam further on top of him. His nails scratched across Sam’s back and fuck… Sam liked that. A lot. He kissed Dean and caressed his face. But even through all of this lovey dovey crap… The need to move was becoming overwhelming. 

"Dean." Sam panted.

"It’s okay, Sammy." Dean nipped at Sam’s bottom lip, voice strained, “Do it.”

Sam took a deep breath and braced himself on his hands. He got up onto his knees and reached for Dean’s thighs, bringing them up and securing them around his waist so Dean was wrapped around his body. He looked Dean in the eyes and waited for one more nod of affirmation before pulling almost all the way out and  _ slamming _ back in. His brother’s entire back arched off the bed and he moaned so loud the neighbors they didn’t have probably heard him. Sam noticed that the angle wasn’t great to hit Dean’s prostate though, so he grunted and grabbed Dean’s shins, throwing them over his shoulders and slamming in again. Skin slapping on skin.

Dean’s eyes rolled into the back of his head and he shouted, " _ Oh fuck!” _

His hands reached out to grab the sheet below him, and he fisted his fingers in the fabric to try and temper his writhing. He was panting like he’d just run a marathon. 

Sam thrusted in again, and he could tell he nailed Dean’s sweet spot by the way his brother wailed. It was a beautiful, broken noise that made Sam shiver. Dean was so close to coming already that he had to reach down and grip the base of his engorged cock to stop himself from letting go prematurely. He pressed his head hard to the pillow as he groaned. 

Dean felt complete like this, all the parts of himself that belonged to Sam falling into place, like his little brother was gluing his pieces together with deep thrusts and slow kisses. 

“Good, baby?” Sam asked breathlessly as he continued thrusting, eyes squinting shut in pleasure and concentration. He squeezed Dean’s thigh tightly.

Dean immediately gave him a firm nod, moaning loudly and bringing his hands up to Sam’s torso, running his fingers over the hard abs there. 

“You feel so amazing.” Sam complimented his brother as he thrust his hips forward over and over again, lips trailing over Dean’s shin, now. 

Dean moaned in response. He hadn’t even noticed that he’d been fucking back onto Sam’s cock until then. One particularly hard thrust grazed right up against his sweet spot, and he couldn’t stop himself from crying out, “Sammy… Sam,  _ please _ .”

Sam didn’t give his brother a verbal response, instead he just continued thrusting pointedly and rolling his hips. He was fucking Dean with purpose, now. He was thrusting harder and moaning louder, wiggling his hips until the angle was perfect so he could drive across Dean’s prostate each time. It made his brother’s breath leave his body in punched-out groans. 

“I’m… fuck, I’m close, Sam.” Dean announced in the midst of a hitched breath, eyebrows tight together and lips parted. 

Sam nodded haphazardly, panting out, “S’okay. S’okay.” 

He reached down to grab Dean’s cock and give him the last bit he needed to finish, but his brother batted his hand away.

Sam was confused. He started, “Wha-” 

“Don’t need it.” Dean cut him off and fuck, if that wasn’t the hottest thing in the world.

Sam moaned out loud and thrust forward  _ hard, _ no longer fully in control of his body. It was primal need, now. 

Dean just whined as he reached around and palmed Sam’s ass. He was reduced to monosyllabic panting at this point. Sam’s hand fell to Dean’s head and grasped at the hair on the back of his neck. 

He murmured. “Want to feel you. Come on.” 

Sam tugged at his hair and twisted as Dean jerked his hips up. The snug, warm feeling of Dean wrapped around him was too much. He was losing it. 

“Oh fuck.” Dean whimpered as Sam nailed his prostate again, and there was the sudden, familiar tightening in his gut that told him he was right on the edge. 

Sam’s cock pumping into his ass, his lips kissing at his leg, his encouraging words… all of it made his orgasm rush forth. The hand Sam had on the back of his neck slipped forward and down to pinch at his nipple. Dean practically sobbed at the added sensation. Sam started pumping into his ass just a tad harder and kissed at the bone of his ankle, and—

“Come, baby.”

Just as Sam said it, he drove right into Dean’s prostate, and then Dean was coming harder than he had in his entire life. He cried out like a wounded animal and shook like a leaf as his cock spurted and drooled all over Sam’s stomach. His moans and whimpers were high pitched and long as his opening contracted and quivered around the thick dick in his ass. Waves of heat flooded through his body, coiling in his stomach and pulsing in his groin. He could feel it deep in his thighs and up through his chest. It made him tense his whole body and curl his toes. His eyes rolled back in his head and then Christ, there were fingers wrapping around his cock. In the back of his mind, he heard a broken shout come from Sam and felt the pulse of his brother cumming deep inside of him, and… Dean saw fucking  _ stars _ . His vision blacked out from the override of pleasure and he slammed his eyes shut. He rode out the waves, panting heavily and squirming uncontrollably.

“Holy shit.” Sam breathed out when he finished completely, gripping Dean’s thighs as he stilled his hips. 

Dean hummed in acknowledgement, still trying to grasp onto reality as the aftershocks pushed through him. He felt euphoric. Body tingling. Breaths heaving. Mind blank.

Sam’s smile was radiant, and he carefully and slowly dropped Dean’s legs to the bed. He held onto his brother’s hips firmly as he pulled out of him, both of them groaning at the loss. The last of Dean’s orgasm was wrenched out of him when Sam pulled out, the tremors rifling down his spine and making his legs quiver. Sam leaned in to kiss Dean’s temple.

“You okay?” Sam asked breathlessly as he dropped his heavy body down next to Dean. His cheeks were flushed and his eyes were glazed over from his own orgasm.

Dean waved a hand in dismissal, his thighs still quivering with the intense pleasure he’d just received. He whispered, “Give me a minute.” 

Sam laughed softly and leaned forward to kiss Dean’s cheek, “That good, huh?” 

Understatement. 

Dean nodded as his body continued to twitch, “I’ve never felt like this after sex, Sam. It’s _ awesome _ .”

“Do I beat the bartender in Leominster?” Sam teased, already knowing the answer but wanting to hear Dean say it. 

Dean looked at Sam over his shoulder, an easy smile on his face. His cheeks were flushed and his eyes were glowing, mouth open as he exhaled toward his brother. He was so beautiful. 

“Not even a comparison, Sammy.” He answered sweetly before laughing a bit and pointing to his thighs, “I’m literally still shaking.”

Sam guided his gaze to Dean’s legs and widened his eyes in shock when he saw that his thighs were literally quivering. It looked like the muscles were spasming just below Dean’s skin. Uncontrollably.

“I did that?” He asked in awe, not even realizing he voiced the thought out loud until Dean laughed in response. 

“Don’t let it go to your head or anything.” He poked Sam on the shoulder with a single finger. Sam laughed and then looked into Dean’s eyes with a sigh.

His gaze was heavy and wet. Longing. He kept it there for a while, the gravitas of what just happened and what it meant settling over him. 

Dean asked quietly, a warm smile on his lips, “What?”

Sam looked into Dean’s soul through his irises as he whispered sincerely, “I just really love you.” 

Dean’s body melted into the mattress, eyes softening. 

“Sammy…” He breathed out as he flipped onto his stomach and half climbed onto Sam’s chest, lowering his head so their lips met and kissing his brother softly. When he pulled away, he whispered mere inches from Sam’s face, “I love you so much.”

Sam’s face was overcome with emotions, but he quickly cleared his throat and added a joke to break the intensity of the moment, “Yeah, I bet you love me after an orgasm like that. Christ.”

Dean laughed and playfully hit Sam’s chest. 

The moment passed and Sam smiled softly, gently caressing Dean’s cheek with his fingers. 

“Thank you.” He whispered, voice genuine and awestruck.

Dean titled his head, “For what?”

Sam swallowed down the emotions so his voice wouldn’t sound thick before answering, “For making all the risk worth it.”

Dean just sighed, and then he was beckoning Sam forward with a subtle nod of his head and whispering warmly, “Come here.”

He immediately dropped onto the mattress, grabbing Sam’s arm and pulling his large body onto his chest. Sam laid his head down on Dean’s peck, resting his hand on older brother’s stomach and sighing contently when Dean threw an arm around his shoulders.

It was going to be a good night. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! 
> 
> Positive comments are always great. Try not to be negative if you can, we’re all just having fun here :p
> 
> :)))))


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